Mother’s Day is such a joyous moment for so many mothers out there, if we’re lucky we get pampered and chores are done without major breakdowns(maybe?). But this day is one that is so hard for so many women in our world. These are the women that I want to celebrate today.
To those who have a bone deep desire for marriage and babies: I’m sorry that we have not recognized how special and important you are. You have heard too many clichés about the “right guy” coming along when the “time is right.” I’m sorry. You and I both know that you’re not loving Jesus less by desiring marriage and family, despite what some people may tell you. You have heard so many wives and mothers, myself included, complain about their children and their husbands and you have had to internally scream in frustration because they have what you are longing for and they are complaining about it. I am sorry. I won’t make excuses, because those of us that have spouses and children are blessed to have them, we take them for granted. Thank you for reminding us that we are blessed. I won’t tell you that God has a bigger plan for you or that you just need to be patient. Your feelings and perspective are important and valid. I am so grateful for you all. You remind me to take life in and appreciate things, you remind me that life doesn’t always happen the way that we want it to, you remind me that being patient is hard, you remind me that there is so much grace in waiting, you remind me that yearning is a form of love. Thank you for trusting in the Lord’s plan for your life and in your vocation, don’t let someone convince you that you’ve misheard your calling while you’re waiting. Thank you for your openness to love and life. You are in my heart on this Mother’s day.
To those who have had a long struggle with infertility: I’m sorry that you feel alone and inadequate. You are more than enough. The pain of tracking your cycle month after month, the endless “negative” pregnancy tests, the seemingly neverending feelings of inadequacy and doubt. No matter how long you have been on the journey with infertility, it is draining. Every time you see a pregnant mother or a newborn, it causes a pang in your own body. I’m sorry. I’m sorry that every month brings a renewed pain and stress. I’m sorry for people telling you that “maybe it’s just not meant to be.” You are enough. There is nothing wrong with you. Your value is beyond anything in this world. I am sorry that you still long for a baby in your arms, and there is nothing wrong with that desire. Thank you for being wonderful. Thank you for adding value to this world, by just existing. I am sorry that this struggle is often so hidden and that you feel alone. Infertility does not define you, but it does leave pain in its wake. It leaves scars and self-doubt. Thank you for your steadfast love for your future children. Thank you for bearing your cross, even when it feels like you will be crushed. Thank you for reminding me this life is not under our own control. Thank you for showing me what it means to endure in trial. You are in my heart on this Mother’s day.
To all the mama’s out there that never got to feel their baby in their arms or the fluttery kicks in their bellies: I’m sorry if you have ever had someone tell you that your baby is “in a better place” or that “it’s for the best.” Our society has done a terrible job of letting you mourn and mourning with you, we have done a terrible job of recognizing that your baby existed, no matter the gestation. I am sorry if anyone has ever belittled your pain and your experience. You were a mama at the moment of conception and you are still a mama. Your baby is in Heaven with Our Lady, waiting for you to arrive, being covered and protected by her mantle. Pray for the intercession of your little one, ask that they will pray for your strength, your holiness, and your love. Thank you for continuing on. Thank you for sharing your heart. Thank you for your hope. You will be reunited in glory with your baby, trust in the mercy and love of the Lord. Thank you for showing me what true depth of love is, regardless of separation. Thank you for showing me what it means to mourn and to be strong in pain.You are in my heart on this Mother’s day.
To all the mama’s who have lost children, as infants or later in life: I’m sorry that you have felt that gut wrenching pain. There is not a cure for the grief that you are experiencing. There is nothing that can be said or done to take away your pain. You have heard from too many people that they “know your pain.” They don’t. You have heard from too many “that it’s a good thing you have other children.” Those children cannot replace the piece of your heart that is now missing. I am sorry that you have been left with anger and emptiness that can never be filled. You understand pain and suffering that is beyond what most of us can bear. Thank you for continuing in this life. Thank you for not giving up and giving in to the pain. Thank you for showing me what it means to follow Our Lady along the Stations of the Cross. Thank you for showing me what it means to entrust your child to God. You are in my heart on this Mother’s day.
To all of the spiritual mama’s out there who may fall into any of the categories above as well: THANK YOU! I am so grateful for all of the women in my life who are guiding me and who have come alongside of me to help me down the road toward Christ. I am so grateful for all of the religious sisters who have accepted the call that Christ has placed on their lives. Thank you for your prayers, your messages, your love. Thank you for taking so many under your wings and adopting them as your spiritual children. Thank you for being a cheerleader along the way. Thank you for showing how powerful prayer is. Thank you for showing that accountability makes for sanctity. You are in my heart on this Mother’s day.
All mothers are important on Mother’s Day. Let us join in lifting each other up and celebrating each other with total joy and sincerity.
The Bapticatholic 